Latest Articles: Humor
Glastonbury 2017: Johnny Depp talks of Trump ‘assassination’
Months-Long Forensic Investigation Concludes Seth Rich ‘Likely Killed by Hired Killer’
Pamela Geller: The Coming Civil War
Canadian sniper's bullet flew for ten seconds at speed of 792mph: Soldier even had to account for the Earth's curvature as he killed jihadi from two miles away with shot so powerful it can hit a target through walls
MSNBC Analyst: Supporting Trump Like ‘Hugging A Suicide Bomber’ [VIDEO]
Man fresh out of coma commits suicide after learning Trump is President
Did Votes By Noncitizens Cost Trump The 2016 Popular Vote? Sure Looks That Way
Migrant Who Frequently Visited Kindergarten May Have Given Children Tuberculosis
Tesla car battery production releases as much CO2 as 8 years of gasoline driving
BUSTED: Here’s How Much “Socialist” Bernie Sanders Made Last Year…
Stunning Coverup Maneuver – Obama NSC Move All Intelligence Unmasking Material To Obama Library To Avoid Sunlight…
A ' Replacement Population' Is Taking Place As Refugees Flood Into Italy
Pelosi: I Am a ‘Target’ Because I Am a ‘Master Legislator,’ ‘Politically Astute Leader’
Carrier moving Trump jobs to Mexico
BREAKING: Draft Senate bill will defund Planned Parenthood, replace Obamacare
Germany Raids Homes of 36 People Accused of Hateful Postings Over Social Media
Severed Human Toe Served in Canadian Bar’s ‘Sourtoe Cocktail’ Is Stolen
Republican Lawmaker Wants to Make It Legal to Carry a Gun in Washington DC… But Only for Congressmen
Outrage Grows Over Arrests of Hundreds of Christians in Detroit
Trump in Iowa: President calls for barring immigrants from welfare for five years
Ron Paul Interviews Edward Snowden. Deep State is Discussed and Exposed
Cop On Power Trip Becomes Internet Famous For Arresting Woman Who Said ‘Ass’
CIA Agent Busted Running a Massive Drug Smuggling Operation
Clarence Thomas Attacks Civil Asset Forfeiture, Lower Court Follows His Lead
HIT & RUN BLOG Students Hold Free Speech Events, Get Denounced as White Supremacists
Former CIA Spy Who Carried Out a False Flag Attack Talks About False Flag Terrorism
Researchers Developing Tech to Allow Dogs to Call 911 in Emergencies
The Philando Castile shooting: Why was it reasonable for the cop to be nervous but not for Castile to be?
Ann Coulter: The Left Has One More Argument: Kill Them!
16.4 Million Americans Think Chocolate Milk Comes From Brown Cows, Survey Reveals
Trinity College Professor on Congressional Baseball Shooting: ‘Let Them F*cking Die’
Exposed: FBI Director James Comey’s Clinton Foundation Connection (Old column, but even more important today!)
Broward teacher deserves 8 years in prison for alerting drug dealers about investigation, feds say
Think Twice Before Opening A Gold Or Silver IRA
US Gov’t Proves Love for ISIS as Bill to “Stop Arming Terrorists” Gets Only 13 Supporters
NRA Spokesman Colion Noir: “Castile Should Be Alive.”
“You Need to Beat this Boy!” Cops Force Grandma to Beat Disabled Grandson With Belt
Video Shows Cops Violently Attack Men for Telling them to “Slow Down”
Remember When Ford 'Cancelled' That Plant In Mexico? Well, They've Just Moved It To China
Your health may be written in the stars: How the month you were born affects which diseases you are likely to get
Graduating senior refused to read speech written by administrators, so they withheld his diploma
America’s War on Drugs Was Designed to Fail. So Why Is It Being Revived Now?
America's War on Drugs (Acid, Spies, & Secret Experiments)
Read Jeff Sessions' Utterly Illogical Defense of Tough Drug Sentences
Thank You for Your Killing
Disturbing Video Released of Fatal Police Shooting of Philando Castile
‘Laughing My Ossoff’ — Kellyanne Conway Celebrates Humiliating Democrat Defeat
Call Him “Her” And Her “Him”: Trump Admin Continues With Obama-Era Social Engineering
The Russians Do It Again: Democrats Get Crushed In Georgia Election Despite 7x Spending Advantage
Man fresh out of coma commits suicide after learning Trump is President
Post Date: 2017-06-22 22:23:43 by Tooconservative
San Francisco, CA | Adrian Blake, a 24-year-old Starbucks employee who had recently awoken from a seven-month-long coma reportedly committed suicide this week after learning Donald Trump had won the presidency. After a miraculous recovery, Blake was reported by doctors as healthy and had recently been freed from San Franciscos General Hospital after six weeks of physical therapy and readaptation. The young man was artificially induced into a comatic state in late October of 2016 after doctors feared for his life when he suffered a strong epileptic attack caused by an ecstasy overdose during a rave party. The strong Hillary supporters mom says the news of ...
‘Laughing My Ossoff’ — Kellyanne Conway Celebrates Humiliating Democrat Defeat
Post Date: 2017-06-21 07:10:46 by cranky
White House Counselor to the President Kellyanne Conway celebrated the humiliating defeat for Democrats in Georgia on Tuesday night after Republican Karen Handel beat her challenger Jon Ossoff. Laughing my #Ossoff, she wrote on Twitter after it was clear that Handel was winning. Conway also took a shot at the pundits who predicted a loss for Trump and Republicans in Georgia. Thanks to everyone who breathlessly and snarkily proclaimed GA06 as a referendum on POTUS, she wrote. You were right. Conway thanked Handel for being a grownup and running on the issues while actually living in the district she was running to ...
Frustrated by Trump's lack of leadership, Ivanka & Jared plot Washington exit
Post Date: 2017-05-29 10:20:32 by Willie Green
You'd never know it, but it turns out Ivanka Trump isn't exactly loving life in the White House. According to the New York Times, Ivanka and her husband, Jared Kushner, are frustrated by how little they've been able to achieve under her father's leadership, and have agreed to reassess their decision to relocate to Washington, D.C, every six months. The paper adds that Kushner is reportedly so unhappy he's telling friends neither he nor Ivanka have made long-term commitments to the White House, despite serving as White House Innovations Director and special adviser to the President respectively. Kushner's White House role has been under fire this week, when it was ...
The Nervous Young Priest
Post Date: 2017-05-19 11:45:29 by Tooconservative
A new priest was nervous about his first sermon, so he asked his monsignor for advice. The monsignor replied, "When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip." So the next Sunday at the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink, He proceeded to preach up a storm. After the service he returned to his office he found the following note on the door. Sip the Vodka, don't gulp.There are 10 commandments, not 12.There are 12 disciples, not 10.Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.We do not refer to Jesus Christ and his ...
Gay baboon terrorises villagers, rapes 5 men
Post Date: 2017-05-10 14:15:28 by Tooconservative
Men at a village in the North West are leaving in fear over a big male baboon that likes to grope and bonk human males. The baboon is said to have attacked more than six men in the past week and whats baffling the villagers is the fact that the baboon only attacks guys and does not hurt its victims but rather performs sexual acts on top of the terrified victim and leaves. One victim, George Chiune said he was coming from the local shebeen when the baboon attacked him and pinned him down. I thought it wanted to kill me but realized it was after my bum,, George said. Five men were admitted to hospital yesterday after experiencing acute anal pains and fatigue. ...
So funny,so true
Post Date: 2017-05-06 10:26:17 by sneakypete
Q: Why do WASPs play golf ? A: So they can dress like pimps. (Compliments of the Linux Fortune program.) Poster Comment:I saw this when signing in today,and thought it was so insightful that others should see it,too.
Video: The unbelievable full-album Sgt. Pepper/Star Wars mash-up
Post Date: 2017-05-04 14:32:11 by Tooconservative
To cleanse the palate, one of the two or three greatest achievements in the history of the Internet.At long last, weve reached the pop-culture Singularity. And it was worth the wait. They did the whole farking album. The whole album.
Cops Investigate ‘Armed Cat’ Holding a ‘Rifle’; Turns out to Be a Stick
Post Date: 2017-05-01 09:53:04 by Deckard
We live in such a dangerous society that we never know when terror will strike
At least, that must be what Newport, Oregon police thought went through the mind of the concerned citizen who snapped the above photo when they took to Facebook apparently worried that a cat sniper with a rifle was stalking the streets of Newport earlier this week. Notice the departments post says reports as in, more than one report. Yes. Cats with rifles. No opposable thumbs, but
rifles. Apparently the cat was given a verbal warning. (The sad part is, if this was a real 9-1-1 call, no one at TDS would even be surprised.) Delivered by The Daily ...
Trump’s new immigration crime hotline is trolled on launch day by pranksters reporting UFOs and aliens
Post Date: 2017-04-27 18:45:24 by cranky
Victims of Immigrant Crime Engagement was a Trump campaign promise Homeland Security Secretary John Kelly said it would help victims to find out if their attackers had been deported Kelly said the acronym VOICE was apt as it would give victims and their relatives 'for the first time a voice of their own' During the election campaign Trump was supported by the family of Jamiel Shaw Jr, 17, who was shot dead by an illegal immigrant in Los Angeles in 2008A controversial new immigration-related hotline launched by President Donald Trump has been mercilessly trolled by people reporting UFOs and extraterrestrial sightings. The VOICE service started yesterday to enable victims of ...
How The Media Really Works
Post Date: 2017-04-19 10:34:43 by Deckard
This hilarious comic is spot-on when it comes to how we get our information.Credit: Dustin Rogers Even the outlets with the best intentions have something different to say about the same event that another outlet is reporting on, and the only thing that readers can do is take each article with a grain of salt. Unfortunately, even if the majority of readers attempt to not react dramatically to an issue, those that cant contain themselves then spew misinformation based on what they read from a biased news source and further add their opinions into the equation. Keeping all of this in mind, Dustin Rogers, a comic artist from Columbus, Ohio, cleverly portrayed this media conundrum ...
What Kind of Pet Should Trump Get?
Post Date: 2017-04-16 10:47:29 by Willie Green
Of all the stains besmirching the Trump presidency the ethical lacunae, the spasmodic policy fits, the Golf Digest aesthetic none looms so large as the absence of a White House pet. Breathes there a man with a soul so dead that he doesnt want a loyal dog or faithful feline trotting beside him when he mounts that lonely staircase to the venerable Master Bedroom?Apparently, yes.It seems emblematic of President Trumps blaring tone-deafness for the office that he doesnt even feign interest in recruiting a furry, fowlish or finny friend. Pets reap vast, humanizing rewards for presidents, as almost every one of his predecessors has discovered.The White ...
The Coming Incompetence Crisis
Post Date: 2017-04-15 17:28:44 by hondo68
President Trump in the White House. I just read that the Trump administration has filled only 22 of the 553 key positions that require Senate confirmation. This makes me worry that the administration will not have enough manpower to produce the same volume and standard of incompetence that weve come to expect so far.Granted, in its first few months the administration has produced an impressive amount of ineptitude with very few people.On his worst days Sean Spicer can produce more errors than 10 normal men on their best days. Kellyanne Conway can flail her way through television confrontations 24/7 and still have the stamina to lose to the Teletubbies on Saturday morning.The White ...
Award-wining Redneck Poem from early 1900’s
Post Date: 2017-04-05 19:04:00 by Deckard
Don't ya just love old people!
Post Date: 2017-04-03 18:43:54 by Stoner
A friend sent this to me. I enjoyed it so much, I just had to share with you all. Hope you all like it as much as I did. " Don't ya just love old people! " One sunny day in January, 2017, an old man approaches the White House from across Pennsylvania Avenue where hed been sitting on a park bench. He speaks to the U.S. Marine standing guard and says, I would like to go in and meet with President Obama. The Marine looks at the man and says, Sir, Mr. Obama is no longer President and no longer resides here. The old man says, Okay, and walks away. The following day the same man approaches the White House and says to the same Marine, ...
Channel 3 No Witness News
Post Date: 2017-04-03 11:53:19 by Tooconservative
Deceased Oklahoma Robbery Suspect’s Grandfather Says ‘Unfair’ to Shoot Grandson with AR-15
Post Date: 2017-04-03 09:01:19 by cranky
The grandfather of one of three suspects killed during the alleged March 27 home invasion in Broken Arrow, Oklahoma, says the use of an AR-15 against the suspects was unfair. Breitbart News reported that the Broken Arrow homeowners 23-year-old son shot and killed three suspected home intruders with an AR-15. According to Tulsa World, Wagoner County Sheriffs deputy Nick Mahoney said the three suspects were wearing all-black clothing, masks, and gloves and allegedly forced their way into the home through a glass door in the back. The homeowners son was asleep at the time and awoke to loud bangs as the suspects made entrance. ...
Ali G - Donald Trump interview
Post Date: 2017-04-03 02:54:27 by hondo68
' Sacha Baron Cohen recalls the Ali G - Donald Trump interview Donald Trump interviewed by Ali G in 2002 Poster Comment:Trump blew his chance at this billion dollar deal, and now he's living in a government assisted housing project.
Senator John McCain nominated for Nobel Peace Prize
Post Date: 2017-03-31 02:24:15 by hondo68
What Annoys Me About Libertarians
Post Date: 2017-03-28 22:24:38 by Gatlin
Ellen DeGeneres Will Leave Her Show This November To Campaign For Breakthrough Skincare Line! (Daily Barf)
Post Date: 2017-03-26 08:35:22 by HomerBohn
Ellen Degeneres recently announced she will be leaving The Ellen Show in November to promote a new skincare line that was recently voted #1 by Dermatologists. The 57-year-old, who now appears to be aging backwards, says, "I went through a complete transformation with one of the best skincare products on the market called DermaFi" Sources close to the couple tell us Portia, 42, encouraged her wife to take a leave of absence when NBC threatened to cancel The Ellen Show because they wanted a younger looking host for better ratings. Portia told Women's Health, "We want to campaign for a greater cause. Women's anti-aging is important for the preservation of female ...
Wackadoodle: "Smart Vibrator" Company Settles Lawsuit Over Collecting User Information Without Consent, Agreeing to Pay Out $3.75 Million
Post Date: 2017-03-16 11:40:57 by Tooconservative
Brave and Dumb New World, But Mostly Dumb. I'm linking this story only for one reason. No, not the relentless invasion of privacy we're unwittingly or wittingly permitting in a quest for convenience and novelty. That's obvious already. I'm linking it because I don't know what the hell a "smart" vibrator is, or why someone would want or need to have a vibrator which is "smart." I've seen the dumb versions in action, and they seemed to work just fine. So I'm linking this to find out what Fresh Stupid Hell this is. Forbes "throws shade," as aging hipster Chris Hayes might say, at the basis of the suit: Two anonymous plaintiffs had ...
Yes, I’m a Nazi. And how are you?
Post Date: 2017-02-27 13:18:21 by Tooconservative
Updated to add: Facebook banned me for 30 days for writing this post. The next post in my feed is some asshole threatening to STAB @MargaretsBelly, but thats apparently okay. How apropos! Im the daughter of a Lebensborn. Grand-daughter of an SS Officer. Im Aryan by culture and by blood. The word Nazi is getting thrown around quite a lot lately, and I think its time we settled on a definition. Im rather offended by the broadening of who gets to call themselves a Nazi. Quite frankly, Im sick of the cultural appropriation. Nazi is a short form way of saying National Socialist, but most current Nazis realize that socialism is completely ...
Performance Art Gone Awry Raises a Big Stink at AvantGarden
Post Date: 2017-02-26 13:35:14 by Tooconservative
Last Friday night, Montroses beloved AvantGarden was besieged by a pair of performance artists who turned a well-intentioned benefit show into a scatological catastrophe of nearly Biblical proportions. The duo, Sonic Rabbit Hole, readied to perform their set for Zoning Out over a Bowl of Ice Cream Benefit Show #1, a charity event open to the public that featured live music, face painting, vendors, raffle prizes and performance art to support a local artist's fight with cancer. Instead of an improvised set of experimental music, the audience witnessed one of Sonic Rabbit Hole's members, Michael Clemmons, perform a muscle-milk enema onstage. Soon after ...
Pennsylvania State Senator Calls Trump a "fascist, loofa-faced, shit-gibbon"
Post Date: 2017-02-08 13:56:46 by Willie Green
A Pennsylvania lawmaker had strong words for Donald Trump after the president reportedly joked he would "destroy" a Texas lawmaker's career. In a Facebook post, state Sen. Daylin Leach, D-Montgomery, linked to a Politico story about Trump's meeting with several county sheriffs, including Chester County Sheriff Carolyn Bunny Welsh. According to the website, Harold Eavenson, sheriff of Rockwell County, Texas, brought up the issue of civil asset forfeiture. Law enforcement can use civil asset forfeiture to take cash and property from individuals suspected of committing a crime without charging the individual or a guilty verdict. Eavenson brought up to Trump an unnamed senator ...
Rosie O’Donnell offers to play Steve Bannon on “SNL”
Post Date: 2017-02-07 08:45:12 by Willie Green
Rosie O'Donnell volunteers to play Steve Bannon on SNL Credit: Getty Rosie ODonnell, a long-time foe of President Donald Trump, says shed be up for playing his chief strategist, Steve Bannon, on Saturday Night Live. The comedian tweeted that shes available to satirize Trumps influential adviser following a scorching performance on SNL by Melissa McCarthy as an angry, gum-chomping White House press secretary Sean Spicer. Responding to suggestions that she should portray Bannon on SNL, ODonnell tweeted: I am here to serve alec has trump melissa has spice i would need a few days to ...
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